Top 20 Worst Songs of 2014:

A bumper crop year so let’s dive right in…




1.The Chainsmokers Selfie: it was only a matter of time for such internet-related language to be turned into a crappy pop hit.






2. Play-N-Skillz feat. Redfoo, Lil Jon & Enertia McFly Literally, I Can’t: never knew a song could literally only be its chorus repeatedly. And the crunk as the aside only distracts temporarily.






3. Ricky Carty Gyal Tek Cocky: only in Jamaica is it hype for repeatedly violent sex seen as something accomplished.






4. Jason Derulo feat. Snoop Dogg Wiggle: I don’t know what’s more embarrassing: Derulo singing bout a children’s game or the dry chorus.






5. Spice & Vybz Kartel Conjugal Visit: its 2014, using certain raw words to describe the animalistic nature of a good fuck just isn’t startling anymore.






6. Florida Georgia Line Sun Daze: I’m not even sure what genre this is because the tiresome reference to ska is suffused by guitars and country-fed vocals…no wonder its such a mess.






7. Swans Some Things We Do: for such a highly-regarded band, this repetitive track is one huge clunker.






8. Lil B Fuck KD: nothing wrong with doing a diss track on a pro athlete, but at least make it good.






9. Avril Lavigne Hello Kitty: remember when Avril was semi-relevant as an emo artist? Now, all I can do is laugh and not in the good way.






10. Mkto Classic: name-dropping famous soul singers does not a classic make.






11. Weezer Back to The Shack: for such a highly-touted band, Weezer should know better.






12. Magic Rude: not even a serious effort to sound stoned, just hides behind the ska smokescreen.






13. The Bug feat. Death Grips Fuck A Bitch: wearisome misogyny masquerading as a serious track.






14. Lily Allen Air Balloon: not even her staunchest fan can defend this slick pop nothingness.






15. Ay Streatz Wut Chu Tryna Do: there’s a thin line between being a sex hound and being a joke. This is laughable at best.






16. Mary Lambert Secrets: tries to be smart but ends up a ridiculous parody instead.






17. 5 Seconds Of Summer She Looks So Perfect: the sad thing is that I think these guys really think they’re hardcore. Scary.






18. Mariah Carey You’re Mine: wretched 90s throwback.






19. Pitbull feat. G.R.L. Wild Wild Love: generic to its materialistic core.






20. Fergie feat. Yg L.A.Love (la la): her return single may have thematically travelled all over the globe but its stuck in transit in reality.

2014 BEST NEW ARTISTS:

Not much happened this year for new artists musically but we still got some sure shots for a bright future. Here are the brightest:



THE YEAR'S BEST NEW ARTIST IS:


Kate Tempest: the established young poet did the unexpected: tried her hand at a Brit hip/hop album and it worked. Maybe it’s her writing oeuvre (winning the 2013 Ted Hughes award) but Everybody Down was a tale of life grimly put utterly relevant.




Best of the rest (in no particular order)…



Gem Jones: Prince Revivalist? Sure sounds like it!



FKA Twigs: its taken me a while to warm to her but finally, I’m convinced.



Mr. Little Jeans: one of the formidable Norwegian pop babes, Monica Birkenes’ grooves are heavenly and highly contagious.



White Lung: though they’ve been known in native Canada since 2010, it’s this year that the rest of us really have gotten to know the band’s giddy punk rock—and yes it does remind one of Hole.



Alvvays: the Toronto-based band has been winning over fans and critics alike with their heart-drenched pop ballads.



Temples: when Noel Gallaher goes stumping hard for you, you know something special is there and these Brits deliver the goods on their debut.



Cherry Glazerr: the L.A. garage bang has the stiff upper lip diva attitude in spades.



Perfect Pussy: propelled by a massive lead single, this band catches all deserved breaks.



Champs: these two brothers (Michae and David) record chorus-heavy songs and hopefully they’ll be around a long time.



Vince Staples: dude’s only 21 but got a smooth rap game.



Jungle: the British band presents an interesting 70s-based take on soul and superfly chic.



Sylvan Esso: great pop juxtaposition from two defectors of separate bands.



Viet Cong: two members of the band Women defected and, presto, this Canadian outfit now totally rocks.

Top 15 Worst Films of 2014:

As always the disclaimer: this list is regulated by one rule only—it’s all films that I actually watched. Last year’s selections were worse and I feel, but for the really cheesy ones, this year was a general ‘improvement’. That said, certain names and franchises just continue to sink while others took themselves a little bit more serious (hello Transformers) and thus elevated themselves into average movie-going fare instead of being God-awful. What is extremely disheartening about most of the films featured this year is that they had material provided for them to deliver but in the end they bombed. Here are the films that made me cringe the most:






1.A Haunted House 2: the first installation was a dud and here is its weak follow-up. MY RATING: 0.5/10






2.Tusk: I don’t even know where to start with this disaster: Michael Park’s long, boring monologues, Justin Long’s hideous squeals or Johnny Depp’s ridiculous French accent This is just all-around dismal. MY RATING: 1/10






3.TMNT: the story would be decent enough but Bay had to gross us out with those awful CGI imagery. MY RATING: 3/10






4.Tammy: triple duty for Melissa McCarthy in this one; she starred, wrote and produced it and it’s no wonder why she’s so uncontrollably over the top in it. MY RATING: 3/10






5.Mischief Night: more dull than God-awful yet still nonsensical. MY RATING: 3/10






6.Before I Go Sleep: Nicole Kidman’s career continues to spiral downwards. In this latest flop, she’s a woman who forgets her memories every time she wakes up the next morning. Why wouldn’t she---her films are forgettable for quite a while now. MY RATING: 3.5/10






7.Left Behind: no one has had more films featured in this list over the years than Nicholas Cage and in that grand tradition, here he shows up as a pilot trying to discover what makes, all of a sudden, children disappear into thin air along with Christians. Oy… MY RATING: 3.5/10






8.Only Lovers Left Alive: nominated last year for the Palme D’or at Cannes and being directed by Jim Jarmusch, I had high hopes. Initially I felt the banter with Tilda Swinton and everyone she came in contact with would grow but as the film soldiers on, it becomes a tedious no-show and no one wants to admit apparently the obvious: its constant and irritating pretentiousness. MY RATING: 4/10






9.The Amazing Spiderman 2: Jamie Foxx covered in blue as a villain is the main offender but now Spiderman himself is becoming pretty corny too. MY RATING: 4/10






10.Annabelle: doing a prequel with literally no ties to what came before makes no sense and trying to copy better films in hope of connecting to something genuine is downright ridiculous. MY RATING: 4/10






11.Noah: too many washed up Oscar winners spoiling the broth and those CGI talking tree things—pretty sure they weren’t in the Bible, Mr. Aronofsky! MY RATING: 4/10






12.Winter’s Tale: this was Akinva Goldsman’s directorial debut and it showed: multiple plots cross wires so often that it’s hard to keep up. Mark Helprin’s novel is rough terrain as is and I’m still unsure about that white horse’s motives. MY RATING: 4/10






13.Maleficent: after being a bridesmaid on so many occasions, Angelina Jolie has surely wrapped up a Razzie for this preposterous film. MY RATING: 4/10






14.The Maze Runner: in this current Hunger Games world, similar films are being produced at break-neck speed. This film is based on James Dashner’s novel that is only five years old. Dylan O’Brien as the savior of an experiment is a stretch but everything else here is the real disaster. MY RATING: 4/10






15.Hercules: one of two Hercules films released this year (I haven’t seen the other) but here is The Rock (Dwayne Johnson) going through literally the many labours of his character. This all begs one question: how many times do we need to do this to get this story semi-decent? MY RATING: 4/10

Top 10 Most Overrated Albums of 2014:

It’s been a terribly boring year in music and when year-end time comes and critics mull over the slim pickings, they usually revert to “safe” choices. By “safe” of course I mean those names they’ve relied on in the past. So, given the context of not a lot happening in 2014, here are the ten ultra-hyped albums of a pretty forgettable year:






1.Aphex Twin Syro: Richard D. James’ first album in thirteen years has gotten an universal ‘good to be back’ pat on the back from critics but how many of them have really listened to it? It’s a seven year project in ambient and it sounds terribly dated and mere experiments penned to music. (METACRITIC 8.9/10)






2. Swans To Be Kind: just like the band’s previous album—it too featured highly on this list two years ago—this one features excessive empty space. This time though, Swans have learned repetitive lyrics and that makes To Be Kind beyond dull. (METACRITIC 8.9/10)






3. Beck Morning Phase: Beck hasn’t been his brilliant self well over a decade now but this sounded like a funeral procession. (METACRITIC 8.1/10)






4. The War On Drugs Lost In The Dream: being named on virtually every list being put out but this isn’t even better than their last LP, which was pretty good by the way. (METACRITIC 8.6/10)






5. Jack White Lazaretto: yet to find his feet as a solo artist like when he was leading a band. (METACRITIC 8/10)






6. Leonard Cohen Popular Problems: I guess it’s heresy not to consider everything he does at this stage as a masterpiece. (METACRITIC 8.6/10)






7. Ben Frost Aurora: still awaiting the lyrics for this sculptured noise album because as inventive as the intention is, at the end of the day, there isn’t much here those who reside above the underground can graft. (METACRITIC 8.4/10)






8. Freddie Gibbs & Madlib Pinata: decent stuff but both artists have done much better stuff so its puzzling why Rate Your Music has this at number 4 for the year. (METACRITIC 8.2/10)






9. Flying Lotus You’re Dead: good to finally hear vocals thrown in but that’s not enough to justify the critical buzz. (METACRITIC 8.8/10)






10. Sun Kil Moon Benji: while I appreciate the autobiographical lyrics, this would work better as a book of poetry…on record its just drab sheet music. (METACRITIC 8.5/10)

Boyhood (2014)

Everyday Americans


Last year, Richard Linklater closed a personal arc of movie experimentalism with the triumphant Before Midnight. The Before trilogy spanned eighteen years, three films done at nine year intervals, tracking the evolving love between a couple in three different decades. Before Midnight was effectively our last peep into Jessie and Celine’s highly-charged relationship with each other and their own personal inner conflict.

And yet it left us wanting more, either to see the inevitable onset of old age or the awkward earliest years of their romance. Our interests were piqued about the many intimate processes that went into establishing the comfort level of their intricate discussions, the inane little behaviors that is unique to each relationship. Linklater had an ace up his sleeve all this time though and, in an obvious reply to this desire, started a project twelve years ago that finally is ready to stimulate our viewing experience. This stunning new film is Boyhood.

Virtually every review of the film so far has acclaimed the method of its making, heralding it as visionary and it is: Linklater shot it over a twelve year span (2002—2013), filming scenes a couple days out of each year allowing us to see the physical transformation of the actors involved in a real manner, not superficially. Critics have been quick to point out that other film-makers have used this method before, notably Michael Apted’s Up documentaries that have been following the same group of people since they were 7 years old. If this were all Boyhood offered then it would be a technical triumph, pretty much the way Gravity stunned with its cinematography last year but Linklater has written and produced the soundtrack to American youth with this film as well as directing a significant piece of story-telling.

The film follows the progression of Mason (Ellar Coltrane) from pre-teen to young adult but it’s not shot from his perspective only. This is Linklater’s distinct directorial style on show; taking in the entire scope of lives and just presenting them as is, not specifically from one viewpoint. Not that he eschews particular moments because when we see the first argument in the film, it is from Mason’s sadly curious eyes as he hides in a darkened corner, observing his mom (Patricia Arquette) lamenting how she moved from being someone’s daughter to someone’s mother in a short time. Linklater doesn’t express judgment through his lens, just painstaking observances, some more nuanced than others. Mason witnesses the changes within his parents and while we watch him watching them, we can sit and observe what registers high on his scale (his dad, who else but Ethan Hawke, forgetting that he promised to give him his car) and what is casually observed (his older sister potentially having sex). It’s this pure maleness of the film that makes it riveting because aside from the usual testosterone bits like ogling semi-naked women in magazines and lying about sexual activities, Boyhood is a rite of passage, an American inheritance reel that has never been attempted in such detail before by an American director. Other directors like Spielberg have centered on youthful fantasies and documenting special circumstances but here Linklater is on a yeoman journey and there’s no special tone being set---this is a long-haul essay into what shapes and turns a boy into a man.

Boyhood, like any great piece of American observational art, is trenchant in its simplicity. Like that immense scene in The Devil Wears Prada when Nigel schools Andie on the importance of Vogue, because she lives her life in such a space it created, such is this film finally creating a space for American cinema to express youthfulness without the trappings of highlights. There are no frills here, just an honest look at life in its ambivalence, similar to the way Bob Dylan deconstructed his own personal demons with the opening four songs on 1975’s Blood on the Tracks so that we can sing along in recognition as well even to this day. We’ve long waited for a new American perspective on something contemporary as youth and pop culture—which, in its own way, is so American—and finally an American director has delivered. The film references this fantastically with the music that plays over many scenes, none more genius that Vampire Weekend’s “One (Blake’s Got A New Face)” to indicate the excitement of Obama’s incoming presidency. As we head into the Oscar season, it wouldn’t be surprising if a better film comes out but I doubt we’ll see a more important American film this year. Boyhood will satisfy Linklater on many levels but it’ll satisfy you the viewer even more because through Mason’s journey, you can cross-reference so much with your own experiences. Scene after scene, from the children queuing up excitedly to watch Harry Potter dressed as little wizards to Olivia’s sudden bitterness towards empty-nest syndrome, Boyhood is the soundtrack to our lives, not just the highly-glamorous bits but the entire Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn parts: scary, uncertain, isolated but resolute in its continuity.

RATING: 9/10

X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014)

Special Relationship





The new X-Men film begins with a sneaky bit of evolutionary theory: mutants being defeated by more-advanced mutants. Technically, they’re called sentinels and they’re not here to joke around. As they ruthlessly crush the band of mutants amid some spectacular scenes, it all suddenly disappears.

What we’ve actually been witness to is something that’ll never happen…a tricky circumstance that is explained to Professor Xavier (Patrick Stewart) by Kitty Pryde (Ellen Page), a mutant who has the power to project a person’s consciousness back to the past and alter fate. Kitty’s power isn’t enough to stave off the dystopian present time that all the surviving mutants have found themselves in however, including Magneto (Ian McKellan).

“This might just work, Charles”, he utters after figuring out how to maximize Pryde’s talent but it takes Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) to volunteer himself for the back-to-the-past mission because of his indestructible powers (which apparently extend to his mind). These are the opening fifteen minutes of the film and they are the most trying moments because Bryan Singer’s vision asks you to suspend reality amid the knotty trail. He also borrows heavily from other outstanding sci-fi films like The Matrix and Terminator 2 just to get going.

Once Wolverine returns to the past though, Days Of Future Past takes off and Simon Kinberg’s screenplay takes shape. We revisit the 1960’s where it’s revealed that the sentinel program got started by Bolivar Trask (Peter Dinklage) who was killed by Mystique (Jennifer Lawrence). She was then captured for research purposes and it’s her mutant DNA that enables the sentinels to defeat mutants in the future. Wolverine must put a stop to it before things spiral out of control or before Magneto’s thirst for revenge against humankind kills them all. For, rest assured, Magneto goes for the jugular in Days Of Future Past in a manner that not even Xavier saw coming. Like the sentinels, he means business.

The main difference between Days Of Future Past and the excellent First Class though is the distribution of minor characterization. While both McAvoy and Fassbender are simply outstanding in their respective roles (Fassbender continues to defy all conventional logic of anyone being able to best McKellen for this villainous role), the other mutants are mere paperweights, scarcely explored for their own complicated lives. Indeed, at one point, when Storm (Halle Berry) re-emerged onscreen I had long forgotten that she was even in the film.

There’s some triumphant scenes along the way however with these characters: the segue with Quicksilver (Evan Peters) playing ping pong by himself and breaking Magneto out of the Pentagon is sheer genius, indeed worth going to see the film alone. When Trask’s mutant-gene tracker goes off the first time, identifying Mystique’s presence at a secret meeting, the awkward sound and chatter is stunningly appropriate. There is also a simple yet devastating scene when Magneto has made up his mind to fire a gun and Xavier pushes him aside. As Mystique flees through a window, we see Magneto fall back but flattens his hand and the gun goes off anyway.






Such detail can only come from a director deeply invested in his source material and Singer is in top form, exploring feelings of alienation and difference through the characters. There are jittery, hand-held shots of Mystique and Beast (Nicholas Hoult) on the streets of Paris, bare for the public to scrutinize them. Though the attempt to tie in the mutants to actual global events is iffy early on, once President Nixon’s (Mark Camacho) paranoia hits the screen, it becomes believable. The ending sequence is brilliantly paced, juxtaposing the changing tides of events as they occur.

While the film continues to reveal new layers of the special relationship between Professor Xavier and Magneto, it also clarifies the main vexing issue between them: Mystique. For the first time in her life she’s beginning to understand her own uniqueness and, ultimately, feminist independence from the two men she loves the most. It’s messy for her to choose between these two “dads”, mainly because combined they’re not a home and separated, both lack what the other one has to develop her into a fully-formed individual. It is this inherent flaw—and not their ideological differences—that makes it difficult when all three are in a defined space. The camera finds Mystique often looking from one to the other, heavy in indecision about whose theories suit her best.

It’s a state of flux that Days Of Future Past isn’t able to resolve totally even after it dawns on Mystique that Magneto is only out to kill her as the simplest way to alter the future and nothing else. It’s that perfunctory for him yet, like the raison d’être of the film, its succinctly to the point. With Magneto at least Mystique knows what lies ahead: Xavier on the other hand is like a kid who’s had his prized toy taken away from him. And every now and then he wants it back.

RATING: 8/10

The Raid 2: Berandal (2014)

Hydras

In Greek mythology, the hydra was a vicious monster that grew double the amount of heads anyone chopped off it. Since then, the term has been mostly associated with global crime organizations like the mafia or any country’s warring groups for that matter.

The first Raid film shielded the viewer from this maxim, instead director Gareth Evans focused on how a police operation on a shady-looking apartment complex turned into the deadliest Asian bloodbath ever witnessed on camera. Everyone came under gunfire and most of them died terribly. The bad guy was killed by the corrupt cop who walked away with the good guy. It seemed too-good an ending for such a bloody film. If the first film dealt with one main bad guy then this installment—by virtue of its title, ‘Berandal’ means ‘thugs’—intends to spread the evilness around.

And, indeed it has. The Raid 2: Berandal starts almost immediately after our hero Rama (Iko Uwais) waves goodbye to his brother, Andi (Donny Alamsyah) and heads out of the compound. Unbeknown to all of them, other criminal factions have been watching the showdown and now that the local boss has died, they’re moving in to take over. Andi is dragged unto an open field by the ruthless Bejo (Alex Abbad) and killed after failing to follow through with a choice that was more a directive. In these opening minutes, through the snarky Bejo, we learn much more than the first installation of this franchise let on and we come to realize not only what is to come but why it will come to pass.

Bejo is a rising star in mercenary circles and at his employ are skilled assassins. His biggest weapon though is one of infiltration—playing on the fears of the younger generation that they’ll never rise up and succeed their old, more powerful bosses. We realize that Andi is killed because he is of no more use to anyone alive and because, in Bejo’s eyes, he isn’t ruthlessly ambitious enough.

On the other end of the power spectrum, the corrupt senior cop from Raid: Redemption, Wahyu (Pierre Gruno) is killed by a fellow senior cop because of his ruthless manipulation on both sides. Rama finds himself in de-ja vu as he is asked to go on another secret mission, to bring down another gang network. The senior cop, Bunawar (Cok Simbara), moves quickly to ensure Rama is embedded in prison—and virtually hidden by prying eyes and ears that may have ulterior motives. “There’s no such thing as a clean war”, he warns Rama, who is reluctant at first to take on the task but after learning of Andi’s death, he finally gets on board.
Once incarcerated, Rama makes sure to catch Uco’s eye (Arifin Putra) and it is at this point The Raid 2 takes off with a series of spectacular pencak silat (Indonesian fighting style) sequences. First, we’re treated to a muddy prison yard where guards allow prisoners to beat up on each other before intervening. Next, Bejo moves in on Uco and offers him a deal that he knows he won’t refuse.

It’s this deal that breaks the ten year truce between the two rival Jakarta clans, both realizing too late the destruction that Bejo is willing to unleash just for ultimate power. Unlike the first Raid film, here we are witness to frighteningly diverse set of mercenaries: Hammer Girl and Baseball Bat Man, two terrifying siblings who wield weapons as if they were paperweight. Along with the Assassin, they start an attack that leads the two rival clans to launch counter-attacks that even has the corruptible part of the police force joining until all hell literally breaks loose. They all turn on each other in a brilliant, bloody finale that Evans expertly guides so that the viewer doesn’t miss any single thrill.

Like No Country For Old Men before it, The Raid 2: Berandal is a stunning expose on the different generational takes on violence. One level gives way to another and all the messy shocks and upheavals that change brings. While the older gang leaders can sit quietly around each other and dream of “peace”, this notion of calm is scoffed at by their younger counterparts. It’s the totality of control that they want and they want it now—no matter who gets killed or maimed in the process. That the elders fail to recognize the same viciousness in their younger charges that heralded their own rise is their own tragedy. It’s cycle often repeated, whether a hero comes along to intervene or not. Rama wins this round with sheer determination but somewhere out there under the Jakarta sky lies yet another Bejo, carefully planning…carefully beheading several hydra heads to rebuild two-fold and come back to claim the underworld again.

RATING: 8.5/10